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ACT For Couples

Thank you for participating in the InterACT: ACT for Couples  training! This post is for attendees who want to review key concepts, access workshop materials, and continue building skills in applying Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) with couples.



About the Workshop

Whether you're newly integrating ACT into your couples work or have an established practice, this workshop was designed to deepen your understanding and application of the model in relational contexts.


Led by Peer Reviewed ACT Trainer and experienced couples therapist, Todd Schmenk, this session focused on the nuances of applying ACT processes to support relational flexibility, reduce conflict, and foster meaningful connection.


Workshop Overview


In this hands-on, experiential training, you explored:

  • Relational Flexibility: Applying the six core ACT processes within the dynamics of a couple’s system.

  • Functional Contextualism in Couples Work: Understanding behavior as historically and situationally shaped, and learning to track patterns over time (the Three T's: Time, Trigger, and Trajectory).

  • The Role of Language and Fusion: Identifying unhelpful verbal rules, relational frames, and habitual patterns that fuel disconnection.

  • Building a Shared Values Framework: Helping couples clarify both individual and shared values, and take committed action in service of those values.

  • Perspective Taking (Self-as-Context): Practicing flexible perspective shifts to promote understanding, de-escalation, and empathy in real time.


Key Exercises and Techniques


Throughout the workshop, you engaged in experiential practices designed to bring ACT principles to life in the room:

  • Show Me with Your Body: A powerful way to identify values and avoidant moves, this exercise illustrates the emotional cost of resistance versus the vitality of committed connection.

  • Observer Self in Relationship: Helping each partner locate a sense of self that is more than just the "thinking mind," creating space to witness painful interactions with compassion.

  • Relational Defusion Techniques: Using metaphor, humor, and shared mindfulness to interrupt reactive cycles and promote open communication.

  • Values-Guided Action Plans: Supporting partners in identifying tiny, doable steps they can take toward shared meaning—even in the face of difficulty.


What You Took Away

  • A shift in how you conceptualize couples’ distress—not as something to “fix” or eliminate, but as an opportunity to develop relational flexibility.

  • Tools for disrupting experiential avoidance and fostering contact with the present moment, especially when intensity arises.

  • Clarity on how to use ACT processes functionally within session, especially in the heat of emotionally charged exchanges.

  • Greater confidence in working from a values-based lens to help couples build more purposeful, resilient partnerships.


Workshop Materials


Below you’ll find downloadable versions of the presentation slides and the progress note template used during the workshop. These materials are designed to help you track process-based progress and maintain functional coherence in your ongoing work with couples.





If you have any questions or are looking for further guidance in applying ACT with couples, I’d be happy to connect. You can reach me directly or explore additional tools and resources through RIACT.org.


Keep practicing. Keep exploring. And remember—connection is often one values-based step away.


Warm regards,


Todd Schmenk, M.S., LMHC

Peer Reviewed ACT Trainer

AQAL Therapies

 
 
 

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